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Are you able to meet aggressive deadlines? Do you have experience doing so in the past?
I love over-time!

Are you involved with any professional affiliations?
BlackCatEliteClub!

Can you work under pressure?
I love when my supervisor watches me work!

Describe a professional skill you have developed in your most recent job.
Not talking to strangers!

Describe a situation in which you demonstrated independent initiative.
Three Clean Completed Ninety Day Rehabs!

Describe a situation in which you've applied your skills to solve a problem.
I have completed file-work for The Publishing & Printing of my IMBA (International Master of Business Administration) & Paranormal Psychology PhD by isolating myself to my tasks while job-seeking on The Internet!

Describe a time when you had to alter your leadership style to be more effective.
I actually had to lead!

Describe the job you have held in the past that was most gratifying.
Waiting tables at Swiss Chalet!

Describe the situation in which you are most comfortable as a leader.
TheCAGBank Owner!

Describe your ability to solve problems in the workplace.
I wait until I must ask for help before approaching my supervisior with the request for any assistance!

Describe your ideal job.
GOD!

Describe your management style.
Labourer!

Describe your previous job experience.
I was too perfect!

Do you like working alone or in a team environment?
I like to work closely with women who like men!

Do you like working in large groups?
Not if a castrate is in charge!

Do you prefer continuity in structure or frequent change in your daily work?
I like to get more & more money!

Do you work well alone?
I live in the KooStarkApartment!

Do you work well under pressure?
The elevator is outside my apartment-door!

Everyone has a favorite class in college. What was yours?
CostAccounting!

Have you ever hired anyone? What qualities do you seek?
FullTime JobSeeking!

Have you ever managed a project for your previous employer? What was the result?
I punch my own time-card!

Have you managed people in any of the positions you have held?
No!

Have you taken any classes since college to bring your skills up to date?
I have recently completed my Paranormal Psychology PhD with Publishing & Printing!

How can you help our company be more profitable?
By showing-up early and not smoking at work!

How do you deal with difficult people?
I call their mother!

How do you go about making important decisions?
Is this legal?

How do you handle change?
By buying beer!

How do you maintain your composure when you are in the hot seat?
I tell the truth!

How do you measure the success of your work?
By the amount of over-time!

How do you usually handle criticism?
I do not look for it!

How have your technical skills been an asset?
I have no excuse for an unprompt time-card!

How much experience have you had with computers?
I love to not own one and I am familiar with using government-computers and keeping my privileges!

How well can you multi-task?
I have been trained by KPMGPeatMarwickThorne in Winnipeg to MultiTask upon MacIntosh Computers which has passed into my everyday-life!

I also was a PrepCook & LineCook for La Plata Grande Restaurant in Annapolis where I MultiTasked while working with my biological-sister Helen!

How would you define "leadership" How would you rate yourself as a leader?
Leadership is the ability to function without breast-feeding from one's mother!

I am weaned!

I am an orphan!

How would you describe your philosophy about management?
Disney!

How would you rate your communication skills?
I love to say nothing unless it is senseless-dribble for simple-conversation!

Is there anything else about you that I should know?
I am The Owner of TheCAGBank, Disney, & The Planet Earth!

Is there anything you would change about your college education?
I would have bought more used-text-books to save money!

Tell me about a contribution you have made to a team.
I set "the floor" up for my maximum-output and lead by production by "the rules"!

Tell me about a past achievement that you attained in your last job.
Father of The Grand Duchess while being her Royal Nanny!

Tell me about a project you completed ahead of schedule.
I DeathStarClicked TWICE [Pre1966 in Charlestown (Indiana) The United States Of America & 19:00pm EST Sunday May 27 2007AD in Windsor (Ontario) Canada] both times using TheLindenLCDQuartzRadio(4AA) & TheDollarBlitzQuartzClock(1AA)!

Tell me about a time that you made a critical decision without supervision?
I took all The T.I.P. Money without asking!

Tell me about a time when you had to deal with a challenging project in your job.
Blistering skin!

Tell me about any honors or awards that you have received in the past.
I have been ranked as KnomeNumberOne [K1] by Scene.CA on Wednesday May 23 2007AD!

Tell me about the most significant accomplishment in your career?
My second DeathStarClick in the same IVGOWedge!

Tell me about the way you work.
Nobody knows since I am so perfect!

Tell me how you would handle multiple projects in the job.
I would task myself around the needs of my co-workers!

Tell me one of your pet peeves.
People having FarmSex in TheCity!

Tell me something about yourself that I didn't know from reading your resume.
I am The King Of Hungary and also a legal Sir & Esquire who is married to a Hungarian Royal Lady who is a Doctor and we are The Parents of The Grand Duchess!

Were you involved in any other activities during college?
I was a Class Elected Member of The Student Representative Council, a Student Peer Tutor, an Accounting Committee Member, a winner of two-consecutive-annual Bell Canada Bursaries and I worked at Swiss Chalet!

What are some of the things that motivate you?
Money!

What are your top strengths?
All night binges no longer happening!

What are your work-related goals for the next few years?
Another planet if there is no DisneyPayOut!

What aspects of your job do you consider most crucial?
Having a time-card which reflects my perfection!

What did you like most about your last job?
Shopping for groceries!

What do you do for fun?
Look for work!

What do you do in your spare time?
I have none while looking for work!

What do you like to do when you are not at work?
I eat, sleep, and clean!

What has motivated you the most to become what you are today?
Starvation!

What is your definition of success? How have you been successful in the past?
I am PaidUp!

What is your favorite TV program?
I have no television!

What makes you tick?
My wife's menstruation!

What makes you unique and why should we hire you over any of our other candidates?
Royal Elohim Supreme Single Birth Immaculate Conception (Hermaphrodite) SIVA!

What motivated you to change careers at this time?
Starvation!

What new skills or ideas do you bring to the job that other candidates aren't likely to offer?
I am not a criminal or psych-patient!

What one word best describes you?
SuperMan!

What prompted you to choose your current career?
Starvation!

What was the best moment you had in college?
Walking across the Graduation Stage ordained by BagPipes being MYSELF!

What were the most rewarding aspects of your most recent job?
International Travel as a Royal Nanny!

What would you like to accomplish that you weren't able to accomplish in your last position?
A DisneyPayOut immediately!

What would your colleagues tell me about your attention to detail?
His shirts were ironed perfectly and his erection was hidden well!

Where do you see yourself in five years? In ten years?
Enjoying my DisneyPayOut or living on another planet!

Which of your accomplishments have brought you the greatest satisfaction?
The 4.0GPA of my Three Year Business Administration/Accounting Diploma [President Listed] & The 3.1GPA of my Four Year Industrial Engineering Diploma [Honors Gradate] which based my IMBA & Paranormal Psychology PhD!

Why are you currently unemployed?
There is no "active" Industrial Nurse in Windsor (Ontario) Canada!

Why did you leave your last job?
My wife gave me a ticket out of Europe!

Why have you held so many jobs in recent times?
Because The Planet Earth is populated by an IVGO (Inverted Pyramid Group Oblivion) which is based upon ShortTerm PsychiatricWorkPrograms which finance SlumLordRentals & CarDealerLemons with PayCheques!
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